Drilling Too Deep

Happy Friday everyone! And as an added bonus -- HAPPY EASTER to those of you that celebrate! - Lily

In the middle of the hustle and bustle of my job as a project manager, I often take little breaks in the day to read something other than lines of code, ranting customer e-mails, ranting internal e-mails, and the mound of reporting that we see every week. Since I never picked up the nasty habit of smoking or sneaking drinks of Jack Daniels via a hidden flask, my break usually entails me sitting at my desk and checking out the news.

Such was the case this afternoon. Having just completed the day from hell, I knew I was almost home free. To celebrate (in my own bookworm, geeky, education-loving way), I decided to see what was on MSN’s e-zine, Slate. I bee lined for the Arts and Life section, as this comprises the most interesting reading for me. I came across an article by Jesse Sheidlower (http://www.slate.com/id/2139611/?nav=fo), which ponders the question: Are there really 988,968 words in the English language?

Being a known wordophile (And, according to Lenny, someone who is apt to create their own vocabulary), the article caught my interest immediately. I never really ever even fathomed HOW many words were in the English language. Most of us just wandered around the world assuming it was an infinite number.

We were wrong. At least according to the Global Language Monitor (http://www.languagemonitor.com/). GLM is the group that has stated there are EXACTLY 988,968 words. That’s right; we’re on the verge of our 1,000,000th word. Sheidlow contends that this claim is bogus based on numerous reasons:

1) No standard measurement agreements. “The problem with trying to number the words in any language is that it's very hard to agree on the basics. For example, what is a word? If run is a verb, is the noun run another word?”
2) What is considered English? The article brings up the (valid) issues of words that came from foreign languages. For example, foods like veal (French) and pho (Vietnamese) have only recently become commonplace in our vernacular.
3) Even if we stick with English, we have dialects. “Even sticking with something that we can agree is English, what about obsolete words? Variant spellings? Regional dialects?” Do I even have to bring up the variants in the urban slang that we use? One’s man’s shizzle is another man’s fizzle.

As I’m reading this article, I found myself thinking the following:

1) Some group of people actually GOT paid to do the research.
2) Various members of the “respectable press” were not only suckered into “…believing that we're on the verge of adding the millionth word to English…” they’re arguing amongst each other on whether or not the claim is true.
3) They’re debate GOT ME to write about it.

All of this is really a long way of me asking the question: Why does society today have to KNOW EVERYTHING?

While I’m all for the quest of knowledge and understanding, it sometimes feels like our society is that precocious toddler who hangs at their mother’s dress hems asking, “Why?” every minute of the day. There is sadly a lack of mystery to even the simplest things these days.

Our society has developed the unflattering characteristic of being a “busybody.” We have to know everything! From full disclosure of military operations to why lemmings run into the sea, we crave information. Nay…we DEMAND the information. Don’t believe me? When was the last time you ran a Google search?

But where does this quest for what I call “knowledge overkill” lead us? My theory is that it is responsible for the cynicism that clouds our world. The press reports and reports and reports every bit of information they have about Iraq because we as a people “demand” it. Then we turn around and bitch that all the news is depressing. Where is the sense in that?

I liken this trend to the movie “The Wizard of Oz.” The whole plot is driven by the fact that in order for Dorothy and Co. to get what they want, they had to ask the Wizard. They went through the entire film being told and given the impression that omnipotent and wonderful Wizard would fix everything. These people even battled FLYING MONKEYS and WITCH to get to him. And what did they get for their efforts? A regular man behind a curtain with the best special effects 1939 could buy. To top it all off, Dorothy finds out from him that she could have left at ANY time by clicking her heels!

Boy, they weren’t kidding when they said the truth hurts.

We want it all, and we want it now. But shouldn’t we learn to scale it back a bit? Why are we sweating the small stuff like the number of words in our messed-up language? If we keep drilling down for more information, we’re liable to run out of mysteries to solve. When the mysteries run out, what will be out there to hold our attention or allow us to momentarily suspend belief?

Our friends at GLM had it all wrong. The time and effort they spent counting words really could have gone to something more useful. Perhaps GLM could have helped underdeveloped countries pull into the modern age with the help of language skills. Or help the U.S. understand why learning a secondary language might be helpful in the long run.

Why sweat the small stuff when we there are bigger fish to fry? Now there’s a mystery that could use solving.