I Am Confident That…

…THAT I CAN RIDE THE BOSTON MASS TRANSIT AND BLEND IN!

Actually – I’d venture to say that I am able look like a local in any city that has a subway.

It’s no secret that one of the reasons why I love traveling to the East Coast, London, and other large cities like San Francisco is because I don’t have to drive. When mass transit is done right…transportation is so much easier.

For most of us who grew up in the Wild Wild (Vehicular) West, mass transit is a bit of the mystery. So a lot of us look pretty silly the first time we’re confronted trying to figure out how to transfer from the blue line to the green. LOST and TEARFUL are the two words I can say to describe my first experience.

Being able to glance at the map and know in a split second where I want to go, what direction I need to head, and how I’m going to get there makes me feel good. And it really finally clicked in my head on my most recent trip to Boston. During my week in there, I felt empowered every time I whipped out my Charlie Card. I could go where I wanted to any time I wanted (provided I was within the service hours of the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority)! On this, my third visit to Beantown, I remembered exactly which T-stop and line my favorite Polish restaurant was on, even though I was coming from a completely different direction.

But why am I so gung-ho about this tiny ability? To me, it means one thing: Freedom.

My high school weekends weren’t filled with hanging out with friends or driving to the mall. If I wasn’t studying or debating, I was doing laundry and cooking! Any place I wanted to go require a yes, no, and a ride. Public transportation was considered lower status and dangerous. So, rather than go through the trouble – I stayed home and honed my reading skills.

With that in mind, imagine how it felt on my first trip to London realizing that all I had to do was mind the gap and remember the line color and name of the stop?

Boosting my confidence: I no longer look like a tourist from Arizona.

You may think it’s shallow, but fitting in is also very important when dealing with mass transit. Don’t believe me? Remember the last time you saw a group of photo snapping, high-end shop loving Japanese tourists? Be honest with yourself and repeat outloud what you said.

Yes, fitting in is important! And it’s not that hard. After experiencing San Francisco, London, Paris and Boston – I’ve boiled down exactly how one does blend in. Seriously, just about anyone can do it:

1. Research, research, research! Before you leave for your destination city, look up the mass transit map. In the day and age of the internet, it’s not hard to do. Before you leave your hotel, consult the map so you know where you need to go! Figure out if you need a pass or if you require extra change.

2. Got headphones? Every mass transit rider worth their weight thanks the techno gods for iPods and MP3 players! The one downside to subways is the rush hour stampedes and crowding. But as they say, music soothes the savage beast. So pop those headphones on and relax, your stop is on its way.

3. Make only FLEETING eye contact. Unless you are traveling with a group of your friends, no one really makes eye contact with each other. They stare politely beyond or above others. While most people would say that is the death knell of interaction, I look at it this way – You’ve been working or running errands all day. You need some “Me Time.” The unspoken personal space rule is in effect. Everyone on the train understands that! This is why Rule #2 makes so much more sense!

4. Take a stand! The variance of age groups and people types ride the mass transit wave is amazing. While seats are abundant, no one really sits down unless you fall into the “needs to” group (the elderly, pregnant women, handicapped, or children). In fact, most commuters take pride in their multi-tasking subway surfing skills! Most fantastic thing I had ever seen was on the Paris Metro. A well dressed and coiffed woman standing during the morning rush with coffee in one hand, newspaper in the other (and reading it), WITHOUT holding onto the bar supports…IN HEELS.

I hope you can now understand why I’m hyped up about my mad mass transit transportation skillz. Being able to navigate myself around has opened up my world. I know I don’t have to rely on anyone and I know that I can fit in. I’ve taken the fear out of getting lost and turned the fear into a sense of adventure.

And that is probably worth more than most things I can think of!

I Am Confident That…

I have confidence in sunshine
I have confidence in rain
I have confidence that spring will come again
Besides which you see I have confidence in me…
- Julie Andrews “I Have Confidence” from The Sound of Music

Okay – let’s admit this to ourselves: Most blogs in the internet vapor are full either funny/sarcastic/pop culture/pseudo-intellectual morsels or emo/depressive/cynical pieces of crap.

While we have the good and the bad, there is one thing that seems to be missing – honest to goodness self-affirmation. Most bloggers (including yours truly) are either bitching/moaning or oohing/ahhing over everyone and everything else. But if you take a step in the direction of “Hey, my life doesn’t suck that much” or “Damn, I’m good at some things,” you all of sudden become full of yourself and one of the Sissy Lala’s that live with your head in the sand.

Well damn it! NO MORE…at least here at MGF Blog. At least for the next week.

Becoming a better person not only means you need to accept your faults – but your strengths as well. We concentrate of trying to “fix” ourselves. The multi-million dollar self-help book industry proves that. But you know what happens when you try to fix things by yourself, right? Most of the time you get the equivalent of having an engine block sitting in your bathtub.

Kind of red-neckish…and it never really solves the problem.

So this week, I am going to write about the things I think I’m good at. In the last few months, I’ve started to notice that my own personal suckage isn’t as bad as I think it is. In fact, I’ve discovered that some of the little things lead to bigger and important things. And it’s kind of nice.

So call me egotistical. Call me self-centered. But like Maria Von Trapp, I’m here to sing out that I am confident…

…THAT MY LIFE WILL NEVER BE A COMPLETE FAILURE

If my life were reduced to a dossier, reading the first vital stats should have doomed me: No college degree, the body of the Michelin Tire Guy, pulling down a paycheck just large enough to keep me living, no sight of any children in my early 30’s, and no great American novel in my publishing sights.

Okay, I’d be doomed if I dwelled on it.

Instead, I’m really busy help build a business at a job I enjoy and am really good at. I’ve traveled to London (THREE TIMES!), Paris, New Orleans, Boston, Toronto, Dallas, Washington, D.C., and San Francisco. I got married at my childhood church. I give really good one-line zingers. The summer before my freshman year of high school, I went to drama camp. I can do Ana Caban’s Pilates for Beginners without pulling a hip. I get to work and train the most talented teenagers our future has to offer as a speech coach. When I think something is REALLY funny, I snort. My female friends tell me I’m a snappy dresser. I am the aunt to two adorable little nephews. I live in a really cute house. I paid off my car last May. I have my health. I have an adoring husband…

…I’m sorry…what were we talking about?

Ah yes, non-failure. With as many blessings and experiences I’ve had so far in my life – how can I be sad that I’m not pulling down six figures or don’t have super-model looks. If my time were short and ended in a few weeks, I can’t really say I’m a failure.

I’m not going say I’ve lived every single minute with vim and vigor. No one can be THAT dedicated…it’s almost inhuman. However, I know that when I look back at all of the things I have done, I’m proud of everything. If you’ve ever played kick ball, you know demolishing a “baby bouncy” is still a thrill. And don’t you lie to yourself about it.

Failure, by my standards, is this grey, nebulous thing of myth. As long as I can own my experiences and walk around the world just wanting to live. I’ll be fine.

To steal and bastardize from Julius Caesar: I’m coming, I’m seeing, I’m conquering.

Bones to Pick

Sorry gang…I need to vent.

Damn you…

Eli Manning – Let’s get a couple things straight. 1) I’m happy for your teammates. 2) You are the singular object of my ire this Super Bowl. Don’t think this makes you as good or better than your brother, Peyton. Fortunately, this means you have a great supporting cast who know when to deliver. Unfortunately, this win validates you and your way too involved father. In my book (and many other San Diego fan’s books) you’re still a WHINY child jerk of a guy. Enjoy your freakin’ ring. Jerk.

New England Patriots – WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED OUT THERE?! All year long you were methodical and precise. Perfection at its finest. Class act (never mind that little tiff with the Eagles). People knocked you for being boring – but you had the score board. Tell me exactly what happened to those guys and why didn’t they show up last night? It was like midnight struck and the O-line turned back into pumpkins and Tom Brady lost a shoe. You had the opportunity to shut up the ’72 Dolphins and make Eli remember he’s just a kid brother! Wasted. And bad sports on top of that!

Fergie – Why did you have to come out with the half-witted “London Bridge” and the inane (and usurping J.J. Fad’s beat) “Fergalicious?” I couldn’t take you seriously. It was all sorts of wrong and I banned you permanently from my vocabulary. And then you finally do sampling right with “Clumsy” by twisting up the classy and timeless “The Girl Can’t Help It?” If you’d show those chops earlier – I would have taken you more seriously. Please more of this…less of the booty music.

My Customers at Work Who Use Our Website – PLEASE LEARN TO READ. And please don’t write to me all angry when you put in the incorrect information. YOU PUT IT IN THERE…NOT ME! Cancel my subscription…I don’t need your issues.

…and now I can return to a better mood…