Bones to Pick

Sorry gang…I need to vent.

Damn you…

Eli Manning – Let’s get a couple things straight. 1) I’m happy for your teammates. 2) You are the singular object of my ire this Super Bowl. Don’t think this makes you as good or better than your brother, Peyton. Fortunately, this means you have a great supporting cast who know when to deliver. Unfortunately, this win validates you and your way too involved father. In my book (and many other San Diego fan’s books) you’re still a WHINY child jerk of a guy. Enjoy your freakin’ ring. Jerk.

New England Patriots – WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED OUT THERE?! All year long you were methodical and precise. Perfection at its finest. Class act (never mind that little tiff with the Eagles). People knocked you for being boring – but you had the score board. Tell me exactly what happened to those guys and why didn’t they show up last night? It was like midnight struck and the O-line turned back into pumpkins and Tom Brady lost a shoe. You had the opportunity to shut up the ’72 Dolphins and make Eli remember he’s just a kid brother! Wasted. And bad sports on top of that!

Fergie – Why did you have to come out with the half-witted “London Bridge” and the inane (and usurping J.J. Fad’s beat) “Fergalicious?” I couldn’t take you seriously. It was all sorts of wrong and I banned you permanently from my vocabulary. And then you finally do sampling right with “Clumsy” by twisting up the classy and timeless “The Girl Can’t Help It?” If you’d show those chops earlier – I would have taken you more seriously. Please more of this…less of the booty music.

My Customers at Work Who Use Our Website – PLEASE LEARN TO READ. And please don’t write to me all angry when you put in the incorrect information. YOU PUT IT IN THERE…NOT ME! Cancel my subscription…I don’t need your issues.

…and now I can return to a better mood…