Dramaddicts Anonymous

“The more perfect we are, the more gentle and quiet we become towards the defects of others.” – Joseph Addison

I’m cutting down on the drama, folks. I wish to have a more gentle outlook on life as Addison states.

And exactly WHAT has driven me to this decision you might wonder? Well, yesterday…I was having a bad day. I wasn’t feeling at all like my perky normal self and thus my mood was less than stellar. And by golly did people notice. In fact, there were people in my life trying to pry out of me the exact reason for my melancholic state and would not take a shrug of the shoulders for an answer. There really wasn’t anything truly wrong with me. It was just that once in a blue moon day where I just didn’t feel like being everyone’s best friend. I just wanted to sit at my desk and work quietly with my iPod.

But land sakes…you would have thought I told everyone I was harboring Osama bin Laden’s love child the way people were acting! Everyone was dying to know what was wrong. TRUST ME…THERE WAS NOTHING WRONG! I’m not on the rag. Yes, I got enough sleep. Lenny and I did not have a fight. No, I’m not mad at Sunny. I’m not still pissed about What’s-His-Bucket and the project meeting. That lame ass joke about my height doesn’t have me down in the dumps.

There is no spilled milk to cry over or river to bawl out while making my way to the bank. I’M FINE.

I guess what irritated me yesterday was that everyone just ASSUMED that something was wrong. I couldn’t be quiet and introverted for one day. As I drifted off to sleep last night, it finally hit me. It wasn’t that people were worried about me. It was the fact that there had to be some kind of twisted drama or traumatic event. Even more worrisome, they were hungry to hear exactly what it was. They were chomping at the bit to see why I was crashing and burning!

Could it possibly be? Are humans addicted to drama?

You bet we are! Tabloid and celebrity-centric magazines are all the rage as a multi-million dollar industry. TiVo’s are filled with daytime talk about crisis and fast food style counseling. The evening news’ headline story is usually the most striking and sensational. We thrill at the vocal train wrecks of our politicians. And let’s be honest – when you hear the rumor about The Girl who slept with The Boss at The Party drunk on The Vodka…you run around Cubicleville to find out the juicy details.

We are so sloshed on drama, we are going to need a 12-step program! We crave the missteps and pratfalls of others so much and so often, we’ve become numb to it. Yes, MGF Faithful…we are becoming desensitized to drama. If someone isn’t crying, screaming, or throwing…we don’t care.

And that, my friends, is a brewing problem. If all we pay attention to is the big boom – what’s falling through the cracks?

It’s great that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are looking to adopt another child from a foreign country. But what about the over 500,000 kids that go unadopted here at home? And while the newly freed, Dr. Kevorkian gives his educated opinion about death being a “natural right,” almost no one wants to even think about the medically disenfranchised.

See what I mean? We have wrapped ourselves up in the notion that if it isn’t sensational, it’s not worth our time. Inherently, that’s nothing but bad news for everyone. Once the big ball gets rolling it’s hard to stop. We aren’t far from a reality where death isn’t death unless it’s in huge quantities and crime isn’t crime unless masses get hurt. And collaterally? Well, we’re just feeding into this growing cloud of cynicism that is becoming prevalent in society.

This is not to say that drama is a bad thing. But like eating a gallon of Phish Food at one sitting – large quantities of drama are not a good idea. Life will always have its up and downs. And let’s face it: I LOVE a good catfight when it involves a deflation of egos.

I’m Filipino – life IS about the dramatics!

But, lately, it’s like no one wants to hear anything that leaves you with a warm fuzzy. Looking back at some of my recent posts – I’m seeing the effects it has on me. Shoot…I said I was happy some Chinese politician was getting the death penalty for endangering the human race. Egads…a little heavy handed even for me! So, in the interest of trying something new and turning over a new leaf, I’m going to have a little experiment.

Ladies and gentleman, I am declaring my life a Drama Llama free zone for the next week.

I am packing up that desperate, hammy camelid and shipping him away for 7-days. He’s getting a feed bag, a few bottles of water, a good slap on the ass, and a good luck wish. I will listen only to actual problems of my friends – I will let them talk out their issues and try not to reach for the gossipy details. When someone asks me for my opinion about some overwrought personal issue – I will give a succinct answer. And when they don’t take my advice, I will smile and let them live their life.

I refuse to partake in a Personal Pity Party (say THAT three times fast) of one! So help me, I will not let anyone I love go round and round about destructive behavior they should have fixed six months ago/four years ago/back in high school. I will learn to separate true issues from trashy drama and steer clear of it. My only dramatic sustenance will be from my Reality TV shows because they edit that stuff to create drama. So it’s like fiction and it doesn’t count.

I, Lily White, will throw away my Drama Queen crown! Okay, I’ll stow it away for the week. I really do like my tiara.

But I digress…AU REVOIR drama…don’t let the door hit you on the way out!