Happy Anniversary! from Elusive Orchid

If our readers didn’t already know, today is Lils and Lenny’s anniversary, their 5th anniversary to be exact. In honor of this, Lils has taken the day off from the blog but I thought I’d surprise her by writing a Happy Anniversary tribute today.

I know, I know, a bit ironic coming from a girl who is recently divorced. Just bear with me, though my marriage didn’t survive, I still believe that marriage is and should always be a sacred institution. I just don’t think that people understand all the work that is involved with being a married couple.

Lils and Lenny are an exception from what I’ve seen and heard. These two realize some important truths about marriage as evidenced in yesterday’s blog. I know yesterday’s blog came from Lils’ perspective. But let me tell you what I know from my perspective of these two.

1. They laugh together. What I have observed in both meeting and talking to them is this; they know how to laugh. Laughter is so important in any relationship. They know how to have fun and they are unusual in the fact that they can both give and take the shit the other one dishes out, typically with good humor.

2. They know marriage isn’t all roses. One thing Lils tells me is that all their friends think the two of them have this “perfect” marriage. She’s quick to point out that no marriage is perfect and hers is no exception. The difference is this, both she and Lenny know they have to work at it and they’ve made a life-long commitment to do just that.

3. They know when to give each other space. Despite the myths, marriage is not two people becoming one. It’s two people making a conscious decision to share their lives together. This means they can have different interests and friends. I know…what a shocker. But in all reality, who wants someone around 24/7? That can be really frustrating and make a person feel smothered and claustrophobic. Everyone needs their space, even married people. It just makes for a healthier relationship in the long run.

4. They know that outside forces can really influence their interactions with each other. They both try extremely hard to keep work and other people’s problems outside of their home. Though it doesn’t always work (hey, no one is perfect after all), they’re pretty good at drawing that line.

5. They know that though they really love each other, love is not the end all and be all of a successful relationship. There are many ex-couples out there who loved each other and yet are no longer together. Lils and Lenny have beaten these odds in an age when the average marriage lasts two to three years. I for one, believe it is because they realize the myths of marriage and have jointly decided to nurture their marriage their way, not society’s way.

*raises glass* Cheers to Lils and Lenny, and may the coming years bring every happiness the two of you could ever want.