Lily’s Conversational No-No’s

“Lily…what gives?” you ask. Didn’t I have a Part II to my Super Sweet Sixteen’s 16th? Well…I started it and had every intention of ending it. However, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Even in jest, I can’t be as dumb as I want to be! *sighs* Stupid self integrity! Plus – I got the distinct feeling (despite repeated lines about that being a “farce”) that people were taking it too seriously. So why torture ourselves? LOL…I’m sure you’re eager to move on, right?

For better or worse, Lillian White is a talker.

While most people would rather sit in the corner of a room during a party, I roved from group to group or hold court with my cousins and friends just chatting away. I believe you meet the most interesting people while standing in long lines. Lenny often gently chastises me when I try to fill up gaps in conversation. “Lily…its okay NOT to talk for a little bit.” My youngest sister once questioned why interaction was so easy for me after I wrapped up a 20-minute conversation on a book with the coffee barista at a Starbucks in a town where neither of us had been.

Can’t help it! I love the interaction! To me – talking is like a mystery/suspense novel. The plot thickens and you learn more as you get deeper into the conversation. By the time you get to the end of it – you’re totally surprised by how it turned out!

While I do enjoy conversing, there are some things I WILL NOT get into! Over the years I’ve just developed this etiquette where I force myself to keep my mouth shut and/or walk away. Very difficult for me to do, but these topics cause nothing but trouble! Countless times they’ve started conversation and more often than not, it ends of in a screaming match.

But some people just don’t get it! I have friends who keep trying to bring up what I consider “forbidden” topics – and they wonder why everyone gets mad or agitated.

So in the interest of public service…and in BrownSuga’s vein of learning more about us…I’m listing off what you need steer clear of when talking with me:

Politics – As far as I’m concerned, this is a GOLDEN RULE. Nothing good ever came from a discussion of politics. Especially in this day in age, we are far too polarized to have open discussion. And more often than not, the conversation’s tone becomes “Us vs. Them.” I’m not a big fan of the topic simply because people insist on things being black and white with little or no gray. And we’re so set in our ways, that when people talk politics, “listening” actually goes out the door! It doesn’t matter who you are: An ultra-Republican, an ultra-Democrat, an ultra-Independent. Your politics are not mine, so don’t try to convince me otherwise. That’s why we all get to vote!

Comparing Spouses/Significant Others – There is nothing wrong with comparing notes on your guys (or gals). But when you start trying to compare my apple to your orange, we’ve got problems. Why is this topic verboten? Simple: When you come to me trying to compare your current love, you’re either looking for a pissing match or trying to dig up stuff on me and the hubby. And trust me – you don’t want that! Lenny and I made a pact a long time ago to not disclose our relationship details to anyone but our most trusted friends. Listening to someone else’s love life is like walking in on your parents. You just don’t want that image seared into your head. I prefer that my mental picture of you to be CLOTHED!

Religion – Ohhh…another one of the non-negotiable rules in my conversational etiquette. Like politics, religion has a way of making people think in black and white terms. Wars have started due to religious conflict – so what makes you think you can have a calm conversation about whose deity is the greatest? Everyone wants to compare, contrast, and pump up their religion. I just believe that getting into a “My god can beat up your god” argument is futile and a waste of time. Like most religions tell you: MAKE LOVE, NOT WAR!

Cynicism – I have this friend that I often refer to as “Eeyore.” Every single time we get together, Eeyore ALWAYS looks on the dark side of things! I can’t remember the last positive thing that came out of this person’s mouth. Cynics are miserable people! To these people, the world is going to hell in a hand basket and there’s nothing we can do about it. It’s always someone else’s fault. And everything is a conspiracy. But there’s never a solution. This attitude just gets so old real fast. If you have a cloud of doom following you – don’t bring it near me!

So what about you, MGF Faithful? What are you conversation killers?