Head Case

Sometimes…I freak myself out with how far my crazy mind can take me. Our story starts this past Monday afternoon.

2:48pm – CRACK! The sliding cabinet door of my desk cubby comes down on the top of my head thanks to the aid of a tape dispenser left on top of it when my teammates decorated my entire cubicle in Hello Kitty (Another story, another time). After a less than 10-second ring in my ears, I started to take inventory.

Vision…not fuzzy. Good. Top of the head – okay, no soft spot. Good sign, good sign. Motor skills? Pick up pen, grip pen, toss pen. Alrighty. I’m okay, you’re okay!

2:50pm – Sit down at desk and try to get back to work.

Alright, so if I move the FTE hours here then…hey, I should really look up signs of concussion on Google. [Quick searches] Well…I’m not puking. Dizziness? Nope. What’s this about the signs of a concussion aren’t always immediate? So they just show up?

2:57pm – Answer phone call from client.

3:15pm – Back to work. So we think.

I need to format that bullet point. Sheesh…my head kinda hurts and I don’t have any aspirin. HOLY CRAP. What if this is a sign? What if my skull cracked and I’m moments away from the great unknown?! OMG…I have to call Lenny. Wait, he’s still in class. What if I pass out here at my desk? In the car? What if I’m somewhere no one can find me for weeks?! JAYSUS, Lily…get a grip! You are totally overreacting. You read the Wiki page, looked up Web MD and you’re perfectly fine.

3:20pm-4:10pm – Continue to work pushing back horrific doomsday visions of being hauled off in an ambulance after a co-worker finds me passed out in the bathroom with my pants around my ankles.

4:11pm – Get into conversation with co-worker regarding the inner workings of our project team. Three exchanges in, I slur the first two words of my answer. Initiate further freaking out while still conversing.

Did I just slur that? How the HELL did I just slur that?! Can a concussion be degenerative? What if I do have a concussion and it’s the start of some freak medical case like on “House?” Must remember this incident for when I go to the doctor. Wait…should I go to the doctor. I’ve been chatting and thinking this whole time with Joe. I’m probably making mountains out of mole hills. I’m perfectly fine…what about blood clots? Do those come from concussions?

4:33pm – Get into car and drive home. The whole 10-15 minute drive paying close attention to every twitch, ache, and uncoordinated movement.

5:00pm – Take shower and contemplate nap due to small headache.

Okay, it’s just a headache, nothing abnormal about that. Just take a nap. But what if I don’t wake up? Chill, Lily…set your phone alarm. You’ll wake up to that. If you wake up at all…OMG SERIOUSLY! You are just freaking out!

6:15pm – Wake up from nap after on and off dozing. Convinces self that this proves I don’t have some serious head injury.

Yeah, as if. What if I lose all my smarts? Is this going to be like “Flowers for Algernon?” [internal sob] I can’t be witty anymore!

6:30pm – Lenny arrives home and we have dinner. I make him check my pupils for abnormal dilation. All of a sudden I feel tired and cranky. Lenny suggests I turn in early for the evening.

7:15pm – Ensconced in my bed, I tell Lenny I am going to take another hour long nap. I have things to do (like write a blog), so an hour is all I need.

“Wake me up in an hour, okay?”

“Don’t worry, I will.” [several minutes of silence, save for the T.V.]

“Lenny?”

“Yes, Lily…”

“I’m going to wake up a vegetable.”

“What?! You are NOT going to wake up a vegetable. You’re fine.”

“But what if I’m not?!”

“JUST GO TO SLEEP!”

Next morning…

Okay, I woke up to Lenny’s alarm and nudged him for not turning it off. I did not wake up a vegetable. I am, however, still sporting a sore spot and a headache.

…paging Dr. House…